Family & Marriage Nuggets

1. 1. A Praying family will manage the tide when it comes. There are slim chances to oppose what you have jointly prayed for. Please, please pray for your spouse, children, family vision and yourself. Pray as if it is your sole responsibility for indeed it is. Prayer makes a difference. Pray is allowing the supernatural to work on your natural circumstances.
2. 2. In family rebuild we have a motto that states that,” Every challenge Plus God Equals to Change! Therefore do not face the problem on your own accord, often times we are limited at our best. Let God be part and parcel of your plan from the onset. God should not be the last resort but should be included from inception of your project or activity.
3. 3. Paul tells the Philippians (2; 2-3) that they should stop thinking of their own welfare only, but rather they should consider the interests of others also. Stop complaining about your spouse; probably you are the one who need to change first. People mostly see the mistakes of others without the inner look. Try your best to change yourself as your spouse might only be compatible with a changed you.
4. 4. A wise man sees a looming danger and takes cover. Taking cover is a sign of wisdom for only fools’ delight in quarrels and fighting. Those who are able to evade undue confrontations with their spouses are wise and they end up enjoying their marriage relationships more. Let not your marriage be a platform for war, as this only destroys your initial dream.
5. 5. Do not assume that your relationship will not be attacked; challenges come every day and they meet good and bad people. Having relevant knowledge on how to handle a conflict is the best protection that a couple could be in possession of. It’s unwise for one to always land in trouble with spouse, friends, in-laws or others. Developing the traits for tolerance, forgiveness and love is a sign of value added on one’s personality.
6. 6. Being open to each other will close the door of misunderstandings and suspicion. Spouses have no ability to read the mind of their loved ones; they can only operate on the information released to them. Being open saves time and energy and removes the frustration that always accompanies closed hearts. Is it not strange or dangerous that spouses could be open to their friends but are closed to their spouses? If you cannot be open to your spouse then it goes without saying that your relationship has a problem, but of course it is solvable. The formula that solves a problem can only work if there is correct substitution. Apply it wrongly and like in maths it won’t give you the desired results.
7. 7. Dialogue is a sign that you respect your spouse. Dialogue is where both spouses engage in responsible discussion about their life or issues that are affecting them. It is vital for people who love each other to refuse the immature drive that inhabits the opportunity of taking the platform of their conscious life. If taken then ignorance permeates into the heart. In Marriage both spouses have to sincerely and openly talk because it is a shared life and this means shared responsibility. If you find yourself not wanting to talk to your spouse, there is another underlying problem which you need to come in term with. Marriage was not meant to be a graveyard of silence and ignorance rather it should be a workshop where new developments are made and also where some ideas are also dismantled and thrown into the skip through couple’s agreement.
8. 8. If you compete with your spouse on issues, it creates not only a tug of war but also a separation into a winner and a looser. No body likes losing! Therefore do not always seek to outshine your spouse otherwise she/he will be your inferior. The truth of the matter is that each of you has potential to excel if given supported by the other. Success of one spouse should be the delight and pride of the other. If you succeed do it together and also if failure come share the pain of the lashes together. Let not one be weeping while the other one is celebrating yet you are one. Remember, United we stand!
9. 9. Do not fail to know when your spouse is discouraged; take time to encourage her or him. There is no body that has immunity to discouragements. All of us face hard and discouraging time from time to time and all we need is someone close to us giving us assurance.  Never rejoice in criticizing your spouse or pushing him/her to a corner when his/her emotional strength is at its lowest. Learn to read the moods and temperaments of your spouse and positively offer positive support as a therapy.   

Lastly Praise is a medicine and a motivator. If you want your spouse improved tomorrow, then recognise what he or she has done today.

 By  Pastor Wangaruro

 In support of stable marriages and families

 For any counselling appointments please call 07940105578 or write to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it or visit www.familyrebuild.org